


Fix You

by bigasscutie



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: (this may be a bit more than mature but just for a tiny bit idk), Angst, Comfort, Fluff (at the end), M/M, Sexy Times, happy ending !!!!!!!!!!!!, iwaoi - Freeform, post karasuno/seijou match
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-28
Updated: 2016-03-28
Packaged: 2018-05-29 18:26:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6387712
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bigasscutie/pseuds/bigasscutie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is what happens after Seijou goes against Karasuno, and they lose. Everyone (poor boy included, for a bit) thought Oikawa was the one who had come out of it the proudest and bravest, but the truth is another. Iwaizumi makes Oikawa open up one rainy day, and it's quite a mess.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fix You

**Author's Note:**

> Ehyy so I wrote this after episode 24 (of seasons 2, do I have to say it?) because I was in tears aND A F*****G MESS OKAY, though I know this is not Oikawa's actual reaction I needed the angst. Don't worry though, the happy ending is real! (I couldn't joke about it ahah) 
> 
> ALSOOO BIG DEAL: my friend (ValkyrieRowan here) and at fandomshitstorm.tumblr.com helped me a lot with this! She helped me with the nasty parts (>.>), bits of plot and with the editing! I love her a lot for this!!!! (go read her fics too!)

It’s been two weeks since their last match. Two empty, awful weeks spent going through a numb routine that meant sleeping, school, eating (barely), studying and sleeping again. After their last coach’s speech, and their last meal together as a team (which they didn’t let Oikawa pay for in the end) everyone has been lost and kind of helpless. Eventually they’ve all made peace with it, accepting that they couldn’t change what happened. They have all moved on with their lives… all of them except for their captain.  

Oikawa finds himself sitting down on the floor of Iwaizumi’s room one afternoon. A room he knows even too well, but if he usually enjoys being at his best friend’s place, today he doesn’t care. Iwaizumi has forced him to go over through a one-sided phone call. He kept saying that Oikawa never goes out, always alone in his room, and that they needed to study anyway. He sounded like his mother, and Oikawa has said yes in the end. Iwaizumi sounded kind of down, too.

So there he is, studying for finals with Iwaizumi. The rain outside is hitting the window hard, and the dark light of the afternoon makes everything around feel like a comforting bad dream. The pencil in Oikawa’s hand feels heavy, it feels wrong. He should only be holding a volley ball, not a stupid pencil. He feels like throwing it away, but instead his hand can’t move and it starts shaking. He should be studying, but the weight of a cruel destiny on his chest keeps distracting him. Time stops, and he doesn’t know where he is, or what he’s doing anymore. The only thing he can think of is the match. Oikawa goes over it again and again, and every time it’s always the same. They lose, Karasuno wins. He loses, Kageyama surpasses him.

The trauma from the loss hasn’t left the boy’s mind since the moment it all ended. Forever. Oikawa wouldn’t play anymore with his teammates, he wouldn’t get the chance to beat Ushiwaka, he wouldn’t go to nationals. He wouldn’t win. As his thoughts keep rushing in his mind, overwhelming him, Oikawa ends up with a broken pencil in his hand and empty eyes looking into the void. Anger grows in him.

Iwaizumi, who’s been trying to look normal and brave, snaps his head up at the sound of the pencil breaking.

“Oikawa.” He says, making the other boy look at him. His eyes look so distant Iwaizumi can barely recognize him anymore.

“Are you okay?” He tries, for the hundredth time. But it doesn’t work, because Oikawa looks away and only hums a useless ‘yes’. Iwaizumi doesn’t believe him, as he hasn’t every other time in the last few days. He puts his own pen down, and decides that he can’t take it anymore. Seeing his best friend like that is worst than being thrown into burning fire, worst than losing against anyone, ever.

“Okay, that’s enough.” He begins, trying to be as patient as possible. “What’s wrong? Just spit it out, all that bottling up is stupid and you know it.” 

Oikawa’s head turns towards him in a jerk, and the emptiness in his eyes scares Iwaizumi for a moment. His friend’s eyes widen and he tilts his head, looking at Iwaizumi as if he’s just asked the most ridiculous question ever.

“What’s wrong?” He hisses and his fists clench, but it doesn’t last long. Oikawa comes back to his normal self and his eyes look down, afraid of staring at Iwaizumi. “Nothing… nothing’s wrong.”

“That is obviously not true, come on.”

“I said nothing’s wrong!” It takes so little for Oikawa to snap again. But Iwaizumi is used to it, even though it hurts like hell.

“Stop it. This is about the match, isn’t it?” Iwaizumi knows it’s that, it couldn’t be anything else. And Oikawa knows Iwaizumi is right… he just can’t stop thinking about it and he just wishes he could go back and undo every bad decision. He wishes he could go back to finally win, to make all of them win. But it’s over now, and being defeated before even going against Shiratorizawa is killing him. Oikawa looks up at Iwaizumi, and his breath gets stuck in his throat. The match is the problem, but it’s not the only thing that’s wrong. Oikawa is alive, but he’s dying inside.

They say things happen for a reason, but how could such bad things keep happening to Oikawa? After everything he has done to get so far. But it’s all been useless. And now he’s being difficult and distant, and he’s losing his friends. What if he loses Iwaizumi too?

“Toruu,” Iwaizumi catches his attention. “talk to me.” He sounds so serious, he sounds like he’s been wanting to talk about it too.

Oikawa swallows hard and runs a hand through his messy hair, that he doesn’t even bother to brush anymore.

“Of course it’s the match…” He confesses.

“Okay. So, what about it?” Iwaizumi is trying so hard to sound normal, as if it didn’t matter. But Oikawa isn’t the only one who keeps thinking about the match, the only one sad about it. At least Iwaizumi doesn’t let it get to him. At least he doesn’t let it kill him. Still, he’s so tired. Iwaizumi is exhausted from all of it and he just wants to get over it, once and for all.

And then Oikawa gives up, and he starts talking. Iwaizumi stays silent and looks at him, sitting beside him as he shakes and his big eyes don’t have the courage to look back at him. But it’s fine, because he needs to vent. It’s fine until Oikawa starts saying things Iwaizumi can’t listen to, things that aren’t true and things that make him angry as well, that he doesn’t want to hear. Oikawa has the power to make him re-live the match all over again, in the worst way. And it’s so different from the first few hours after the match, because Oikawa had been strong for him then, so positive for everyone else (he even face Ushijima without breaking apart), but now it feels like he’s drowning in his self-pity and anger. Like he’s not the same person anymore.

Oikawa talks about Kageyama, he talks about Hinata and all the times he couldn’t predict his powerful, insane attacks. He talks and he rants about the other team’s strategies. He gets angry for every time he hasn’t tossed as he should have, and he even starts doubting about letting Kyotani play. Maybe he shouldn’t have, he’s been reckless and he hasn’t thought enough about it. About anything at all. Oikawa keeps telling him how he should have been smarter, quicker, stronger.

Iwaizumi listens, nodding every now and then and feeling his stomach tighten every time Oikawa looks sad and desperate. Oikawa’s voice is raw and every fear and insecurity is bare in front of Iwaizumi. As the other boy’s glasses slip down his nose, Iwaizumi notices the eyes behind them being glassy and distant. And Oikawa is looking at him but he’s not really seeing him; the moments of the match are just playing over and over behind his eyes, slowly driving him mad. Oikawa doesn’t look like himself, and the soft, dark light of the rainy day makes him look like a ghost.

Iwaizumi feels the anger bubbling under the surface as Oikawa tears apart every move they’d made in that match, from letting Karasuno take the first set all the way till not being able to block that final spike. A moment that has scarred them both, a moment they will never forget. Iwaizumi has thought a lot about it, if that was the same thing Karasuno had felt last time. But then again, Iwaizumi doesn’t need to wonder about that. He knows already, and it’s not the first time they have lost too. They always lose, and it is frustrating.

Oikawa is finally admitting the hopeless despair that has been consuming him since that day and it’s killing Iwaizumi to see him like this.

“-and I should have told the coach not to put Yahaba in that early, we needed more defense in that volley. I was stupid and everyone paid for it and I’m sorry, I’m so sorry-”

“Shut up.” Iwaizumi snaps then, he can’t do this anymore.

“What?” Oikawa says, waking up for the first time during the long rant. His expression is off and his eyes are still blurry behind his glasses, but he’s looking at Iwaizumi properly now with confusion.

“Just stop.” Iwaizumi says pleadingly, not knowing what he wants to say. What could he say? He just can’t keep listening to his best friend crying over himself like that, Oikawa shouldn’t say those things.

Oikawa cocks his head in question and the innocence of it -along with the repressed anger and sadness- strikes Iwaizumi harder than anything else before that moment. Oikawa doesn’t deserve this, any of it.

“Stop saying you’re sorry. This isn’t your fault,” Iwaizumi says then, voice small as he looks away. “it’s not your fault, Toruu, so just… stop.”

“But… but it is my fault!” Oikawa cries out, desperation entering his voice. “All of it!” Oikawa feels his heart beating wild in his chest, trying not to give up as he drowns in the dark shade of his own failure.

“How is it your fault?” Iwaizumi raises his voice, clenching his jaw and narrowing his eyes before speaking again. “How many times do I have to tell you that it’s not just about you, it’s about all of us! The six players playing in the court. It’s not your fault so stop.”

“You’re wrong.” Oikawa says, his voice heated and aching. “You’re wrong! This is about me! I’m the captain, I should have made you all win! But I didn’t! I didn’t because I couldn’t make it, because I didn’t practice enough- I should have practiced enough. I should have-”

“Then what about me?” Iwaizumi snaps and it’s bad and it shouldn’t have. This isn’t about Oikawa, as much as it isn’t about him. But he can’t help it. He was the ace, he should have made the team win too. What kind of ace is he? But Oikawa doesn’t blame him, he can’t, he could never blame him. He has already told him so, anyway.

He looks at Iwaizumi and his lips shake as his eyes widen again and they both don’t know what to say for a moment. The silence between them is dangerous, it could cut them alive.

“It’s my fault. I should have done more, worked more…” Oikawa whispers and looks down. He’s never looked so sad, so hurt. It’s painful for the both of them, and Iwaizumi is about to explode. And he does.

Iwaizumi punches Oikawa in the face once, he doesn’t slap him or hits him with his head. He punches him hard, and Oikawa stumbles back from where he’s sitting and ends up half lying on the ground, raising himself up with one elbow.

A loud thunder echoes outside, and the world comes down to pieces. Iwaizumi lets it all out.

“You’re an idiot!” Iwaizumi shouts, his voice fighting hard not to break. “You worked harder than any of us. You think I didn’t see that? You think we all didn’t notice how badly you wanted this? But the truth is we all worked our asses off and it just wasn’t enough!” Iwaizumi ends up breathless and belatedly notices that his cheeks are wet, warm. He’s crying. When did that happen?

“Iwa-chan…” Oikawa says in a muffled voice, rubbing his hand over the blood dripping from his nose. Oikawa feels Iwaizumi’s last words resounding in his head louder than his own helplessness. He tried so hard, but it wasn’t enough. Oikawa isn’t enough, he’s never enough. Never enough, never enoug-

“That doesn’t mean that we didn’t do our best! That doesn’t mean that you are not a great player, or that you didn’t deserve to win. Oikawa you are the best setter I’ve ever known and I don’t give a damn about Kageyama’s genius or Ushiwaka’s spikes. I don’t care!” Iwaizumi isn’t done and, as tears keep streaming down his flushed face and he can barely see anymore, he just has to say those things. He has to let Oikawa know that it’s not his fault. That they lost, so what?

“You are enough, Toruu…” He says, his voice faster than his mind. Oikawa freezes and looks up at him, mouth parted and eyes shocked.

“I’m not!” Oikawa snaps, his voice growling loud along with another thunder, the rain as hard as ever. It looks like hell outside, it’s even worse inside. “How could you say that? You all did a great job but if I only I could have been better, we would have won!”

“What? Do you even realize what are you saying?”

“Yes! Yes, I am! I am not enough, Hajime!” Iwaizumi’s first name on his lips sounds miserable and desperate. Why can’t he believe him? Why can’t Oikawa believe Iwaizumi, though? “I never was…” Oikawa whispers sitting up, and now he’s crying too.

They are a mess. “And it’s all my fault…”

Why does he have to keep saying that? “Stop.”

Oikawa thinks he’s worthless, but Iwaizumi could give him millions of reasons to prove him wrong. He would give up everything, just to show Oikawa how much he’s worth. Or at least, how much he’s worth to him. Iwaizumi feels like the whole world is wrong and his friend will never be the same again. But he can’t let that happen.

“Hajime…” Oikawa starts, and he sounds completely hopeless. He sits up and tears run down his perfect skin, wetting his long eyelashes and making his eyes shine with desolation. “I’m broken.” He says, and his voice breaks too into more tears.

It’s how Oikawa feels. Like there is nothing he can do to pick himself up, nothing he can try anymore. He was strong for a while, but it hasn’t lasted at all. He doesn’t want the world to see him, he doesn’t want Iwaizumi to look at him as he falls. He wants to hide away and waste his talent away. What talent? Oikawa feels lost and there is nothing he can do. He’s broken, and time or determination won’t help him. He’s broken.

Iwaizumi doesn’t understand. How can Oikawa say that? He’s so strong, so brave in his eyes. Oikawa is what keeps him going. When he feels down he’s there for him, no matter how annoyingly so. When he feels proud, Oikawa is there to cheer for him. When he’s happy, it’s because of Oikawa. When they win, it’s because of Oikawa. And when they lose? He wants to be there for him as he is for all of them. As the good captain he is. Iwaizumi hates this, but his heart slows down and he sighs, tears slowly stopping. Oikawa cries, and he wants to make him feel better.

He slides closer to him and suddenly hugs him, so tight the other one doesn’t understand what’s happening for a second. Iwaizumi hugs him and he hopes it’s enough, because he doesn’t want to let go. He wants to pick Oikawa up from the ground and make him see the light again.

“So what?” He says, hugging him tighter. Another heavy tear dropping from his red eyes. “So what if you’re broken? I will fix you.”

Oikawa gasps loudly in between sobs, and then his hands grasp Iwaizumi’s shirt and he lets go. They can both feel their hearts, so close to each other, beating loud and hard as if there was no tomorrow. As if all they have in this world is each other, as if they could never find anyone better, anywhere else. No one who can understand them as they both do with one another. Because they have known each other for so long, they care so much it feels crazy sometimes.

“Are you sure, Iwa-chan?” Oikawa asks hesitantly, still not letting go of Iwaizumi.

“Yes. Yes, I’m sure.” Iwaizumi has never been so serious, but then he feels like trying to ease the tension. “Besides, there is nothing there to fix. Except maybe for your self-centered ass.”

They both giggle in the hug, a broken laughter mixed with tears. That’s who they are, idiots who make everything more tragic than it has to be and who, then, find their own ways to laugh it off. Because Iwaizumi knows no other way to survive and Oikawa trusts him enough to follow him in this.

“I’m so scared, Iwa-chan..” Oikawa says suddenly, scared of not getting over this and staying like this forever, scared for the pain and the hopeless feelings to never go away. Iwaizumi feels his hot breath over his neck where his head is lying and he rubs his hand over Oikawa’s back.

“You don’t have to be.”

Oikawa shakes in his arms and Iwaizumi breaks the hug, facing Oikawa and looking at him right into his brown eyes. He brings his arms up and takes his glasses off, Oikawa’s eyes stare at him wide and confused. Iwaizumi smiles a small comforting smile and dries Oikawa’s tears off his beautiful face. It’s heartbreaking. And as Iwaizumi looks at him, his heart truly stops. How can it be possible for anyone to look that beautiful while crying? Iwaizumi doesn’t know, but Oikawa is thinking the exact same thing.

Iwaizumi brings his forehead against Oikawa’s and breathes deeply, filling his lungs with his best friend’s lovely smell. Oikawa closes his eyes and slides his hands from Iwaizumi’s back to his neck, holding him tight. They both sigh, and Iwaizumi feels like crying again. His hands rub Oikawa’s arms, and then he withdraws and cups his heated cheeks.

Oikawa opens his eyes and looks at him. Staring into Iwaizumi’s eyes feels like staring into the night sky, they sparkle like the stars he loves so much. It has stopped raining, and the new clear light coming from the window illuminates Iwaizumi’s face, making him look like an angel. Oikawa has never thought of him as such, but he really must be like a personal guardian angel because he could never get so lucky any other way.

“I-” Oikawa starts, still feeling sad, because things don’t get better just like that. Even though Iwaizumi touching him feels amazing, like something he’s always wanted and never knew that he needed so much. “I still feel like it’s all my fault. I can’t help it, Iwa-chan. And I’m so sorry, I’m so sorr-”

Iwaizumi rolls his eyes, and to stop the anger from coming back up his instinct acts before his mind can think straight. Iwaizumi closes the distance between them quickly, and suddenly his lips are on Oikawa’s. His hands still cupping his cheeks, steady, warm.

They both freeze at the contact, eyes closed and lips still. They hold their breaths, and Iwaizumi doesn’t know what to do. But then Oikawa’s lips feel softer, more relaxed. Iwaizumi breaks away and looks at him, eyebrows furrowed and worried. What if Oikawa didn’t want this? But Oikawa looks at him and it’s like life has come back to him like fresh wind in summer, he looks like himself again and more. Hope replaces emptiness, anticipation replaces anger and sorrow. They both don’t know what’s happening.

“I’m sorry too.” Iwaizumi surprises Oikawa with his answer.

“What? Iwa-chan what are you saying? What are you sorry for?” Oikawa suddenly sounds so concerned, so innocent it’s almost adorable.

“I’m sorry because you are an idiot that can’t see just how good he is. Tooru, you are enough.” Iwaizumi truly means it, there is no way Oikawa wouldn’t be worth it in any possible reality.

“I don’t believe you.” Oikawa sure is stubborn that afternoon, but it’s not a problem because Iwaizumi is there for him. Like he’s always been.

And Iwaizumi kisses him again, only this time he knows what to do. He knows where his mouth is going, he knows that soft lips are waiting for him and his hands explore from his cheeks to his neck. Even though the kiss is a simple one, after he hears Oikawa panting into it, Iwaizumi starts feeling a vibrant fire growing inside him. Where is this coming from? Why are they kissing, and why does it feel so natural? Iwaizumi has only wanted to shut him up before, but now it feels like an idiot for not doing it sooner. He also realises he’s always wanted to do this, every time Oikawa has looked too pretty or has said something incredibly nice to him, even as joke. Usually he would blush and push him away, but now it’s different.

Oikawa wasn’t waiting for anything else. He’s been hoping for this all his life, but he never thought it would happen right now. After losing against Karasuno. The irony of it kills him. He drowns in Iwaizumi’s arms and he wishes for him to never let go. But he does, and their kiss ends again.

“Do you believe me now?” Iwaizumi asks in an attentive breath.

“Maybe.” Oh, so Oikawa is being a little shit now. But Iwaizumi doesn’t care, not as long as he’s not sad anymore. He would kiss him for the rest of his life if only he could be sure to keep him safe forever.

Iwaizumi kisses him again, and Oikawa’s hands are like fire sliding over the back of his head, grasping his short hair.

“I’m almost convinced.” Oikawa says in a faltering giggle.

“Really?” Iwaizumi’s eyes widen with joy, actually hoping for the words to be true. It’s all he wants. But Oikawa sighs and looks down, tilting his head to the side and hiding from Iwaizumi.

“N- Not really. No. I just wanted another kiss…” Iwaizumi freezes in shock. Another kiss. It’s like saying it out loud makes it even more real, like something that is actually happening and he still hasn’t realized. But then his attention focuses on Oikawa’s first words and he wants to slap him. He doesn’t; instead he caresses his cheek, he places a hand under his chin and raises his head up. So that they can stare at each other, and Oikawa looks so afraid. Like he’s about to cry again.

“Can you promise me something?” Iwaizumi asks, smiling softly at him. His heart is full of warming care, and he’s almost sure he’s never loved his best friend like he does right now.

“What?” Oikawa replies, confused but slightly smiling back at him. How could he not when Iwaizumi is looking at him like he’s the only boy on earth.

“Promise me that, no matter what, you will never give up on your dreams.” He says, and gives Oikawa another quick gentle kiss. “Promise me that every time you are going to fall down, you will get up once again.” He gives him another kiss. “Promise me.”

He waits, so close to Oikawa that he can taste his breath in his mouth. The taller boy’s hands take his away from his own cheeks and squeeze them. He takes a deep breath, he shakes.

“What if I can’t?” He asks in such a low voice. Iwaizumi frowns, and squeezes his hands back.

“That’s not going to happen.”

“Yes, it will.”

“How can you be so sure?” There is a long pause, and Iwaizumi is so scared everything will break apart again. That Oikawa will snap again and go back to his self-pity and self-hate.

“I can’t… if you’re not there.” Oikawa says, and he can finally say that. He can finally tell Iwaizumi how important he is in his life. How weak he is without him. But with him by his side he would be willing to get up and try again. Over and over.

“I’m right here.” Iwaizumi says, closing the distance between them. Their lips brush, but they don’t kiss.

“You’re not going to be there in a few months.” Iwaizumi stops.

“What do you mean?”

“You know what… What about university? Who knows what will happen then?” It’s true, and Iwaizumi can’t say he hasn’t thought about this. Because he has, so many times. It’s just too scary to talk about.

“I’ll be there.” He says, confident and stubborn, frowning his eyebrows.

“You don’t know!” Oikawa’s voice sounds desperate again, and a thin tear falls over his cheek.

“You can’t know, Iwa-chan. This is impossible, this is going to end badly one way or another and I’m not ready. I can’t be without you!” It comes out as a quick, unexpected rant and hearing Oikawa crying out the words from so near breaks his heart. I can’t be without you.

“Shut up.”

“And if you’re not there, Iwa-chan, then I’m going to fail again and again-”

“Shut up.”

“And I can’t do it without you.”

“Shut up.” Iwaizumi snaps, this time he doesn’t care about being patient. He doesn’t want to hear any of this. He can’t take it. “I’m not going anywhere.” He says, and then they’re kissing again.

It’s another kind of kiss. It’s not gentle, it’s not hesitating. Iwaizumi kisses him, and it’s everything but soft. Iwaizumi kisses him to shut him up and because Oikawa’s eyes looked so lost. Iwaizumi usually loves how Oikawa looks at him, even in a situation like that, but kissing him feels like the only solution now. Their lips meet and Oikawa gasps into the kiss again, surprised by the energy and force Iwaizumi puts into it.

Iwazumi frees his hands from Oikawa’s and brings them up his chest until they lock behind his head and they bring him closer. Oikawa’s body feels so hot and Iwaizumi wants him nearer, either to protect him or protect himself from his absence. Iwaizumi is feelings things he’s never felt, and when Oikawa puts his arms around him too and kisses him back, his head gets dizzy and his mouth parts.

Iwaizumi kisses Oikawa like he needs to be kissed and when the distance between their bodies begins to feel like they are an ocean away -and they can’t stand it- Iwaizumi pulls Oikawa on his lap with a strong jerk. Oikawa moans in the kiss as it happens and Iwaizumi pulls his hands around Oikawa, holding on to him. Oikawa opens his mouth, and they breathe into each other until Iwaizumi leans in and deepens the kiss. His hands shoot up to grasp Oikawa’s hair, pulling it slightly, and Oikawa moans again. And Iwaizumi had no idea but it sounds so good he could come apart right there right now.

Iwaizumi’s slides his tongue into Oikawa’s mouth, and the taller boy sucks in his breath. But then he lets go, Iwaizumi has fully caught his attention. Oikawa plays with Iwaizumi’s tongue and kisses him again and again until it’s hard to breathe. They break it off and pant, holding onto each other. They have been putting all the anger, all the insecurities from before into the kiss and now Iwazumi is not even sure why they’re doing this. But Oikawa gently bites his lip and Iwaizumi starts kissing him again, not caring about anything else. Oikawa doesn’t seem to mind.

Iwaizumi’s hands start running all over Oikawa’s body, as far as he can go, and every touch burns like fire. Oikawa tastes of cinnamon and salt from the tears of before, and Iwaizumi can’t get enough of it. It feels so warm and wet, and he never knew kissing Oikawa would make him feel like entering heaven and leaving for hell. Iwaizumi tastes like mint and sounds like a dream with every broken gasp and extended moan that Oikawa pulls out of him.

The anger soon becomes eagerness and need, mixed with love and a desire buried so deep inside both of them that feeling it all at once is like discovering a whole new world. A scary, amazing one. Oikawa arches his back and pulls Iwaizumi’s head closer, never leaving his lips alone. The gesture makes Iwaizumi squeeze his eyes shut, trying to keep his voice down.

Oikawa’s warmth against him sends a shiver down his spine, and when the other boy’s hands run lower and raise his shirt up he has to break the kiss off. He hisses, as soon as Oikawa’s long, cold fingers touch the skin under his clothes. Oikawa smirks into the kiss, only Iwaizumi hasn’t forgotten about him. He wants to kiss him again, but Oikawa is quicker and stronger. He pushes him down on the floor and sits on top of him.

It’s funny to think that just a few minutes before they were crying and screaming, and now Oikawa’s empty eyes are filled with heat and Iwaizumi can barely remember his own name, all he feels is want. Especially with Oikawa on top of him, leaning over to kiss him, with his hands still running over the hard plane of muscle on his stomach and slowly trailing down. Oikawa looks at him, biting into his own lip and Iwaizumi glances back at him through his dark eyelashes. Oikawa gets closer, and his hands go around Iwaizumi’s body and press down into his back, his nails digging in and exploring, leaving light scratches. Now it’s Iwaizumi’s turn to arch his back, moaning into Oikawa’s mouth, which is now brushing his. Iwaizumi leans in to steal yet another kiss, but Oikawa’s head moves back and it’s like he doesn’t want him to kiss him.

Iwaizumi frowns, confused and hungry for another kiss. Oikawa comes back, bumps his nose over his and brushes his lips with his, again. Iwaizumi can smell his taste, but he can’t have it. And it pisses him off, because he doesn’t know what’s going on with Oikawa. But Oikawa knows, Oikawa is looking at him with fire and, still, lots of self-doubt. He’s dying for Iwaizumi to kiss him but at the same time he’s scared of it. Because what if he gets this wrong too? What if he’ll disappoint him? And he’s screaming it to him through a long, uncertain stare that Iwaizumi can’t read.

In the tension of the moment, one Iwaizumi can’t stand, he decides to do something about it. Iwaizumi rolls over Oikawa, who gasps loudly as Iwaizumi’s powerful arms wrap around his back and pulls his body under his own, they legs tangling together. Then Iwaizumi pins Oikawa’s hands against the floor above his head. Iwaizumi stares at him, and for the first time that afternoon he realizes just how beautiful Oikawa is. Not crying anymore, no. He’s heavily breathing and looking up at him with his lips parted, swollen and red. His eyes are begging Iwaizumi to do… anything. Iwaizumi’s eyes run up and down his face and his throat, admiring what he’s never stopped to admire before. Not so consciously at least. He’s so lucky. But it’s not enough.  

“Promise me.” He says, and Oikawa’s eyes shine and widen. He knows what he’s asking, and it warms his heart to know that Iwazumi cares so much.

“I-” As soon as Oikawa starts talking, Iwaizumi’s hands squeeze tighter around his wrists. Oikawa’s breath quicken, and a hot shiver overwhelms him.

“I promise.” Iwaizumi gets closer, he narrows his eyes and stares, waiting for more.

“I promise I will never give up on my dreams, Iwa-chan. Don’t worry.” Iwaizumi’s eyes soften then, and he tilts his head to the side wondering if he’s been too hard on him. Oikawa’s words sound sincere. He sounds like he means it.

“I’ll be here.” He reassures him, and then he kisses him again. The kiss deepens again, fast enough, and Iwaizumi wants more. Oikawa, too.

They are desperate for each other, and kissing is not enough, their bodies feeling warm against each other. Iwaizumi finally takes Oikawa’s shirt off and Oikawa does the same, the few seconds of them not kissing are grating, but then Iwaizumi sees Oikawa’s bare chest and his breath catches. The touch burns them and skin against skin suddenly feels like painful pleasure and they can’t stop. Excitement transports them away and their hands run wild exploring, mapping, tasting every sharp line of muscle on the bodies they’d both trained so hard. Time doesn’t exist, the world outside is gone and it feels like they never lost a match, not once. It feels like they have won them all, and the sensation is intoxicating.

The joy is overwhelming, and there is a kind warmth in their hearts, but also the need not to stop moving and express the passion they’re feeling in every possible way. And they do, as they kiss without stopping, rubbing ardent tongues against each other and feeling their lips wet and soft aching together. They roll their hips against each other and Oikawa’s hands grab up at Iwaizumi’s ass, who wasn’t expecting it and lets out a dirty moan. He definitely doesn’t mind and their kiss deepens as the delicious friction between them hits him hard, and he feels Oikawa smiling again.

Iwaizumi is hard, it’s not exactly a surprise, but feeling Oikawa like that under him too leaves him breathless, feeling desperate and wild. He kisses him one last, wet time before his mouth moves from Oikawa’s sweet lips to his jaw, tracing kisses down his neck. It’s fast and it’s urgent and Oikawa moans, hips still moving together. Thinking about before and what Oikawa has made him feel, Iwaizumi licks his smooth skin, and then bites down on his neck. Oikawa groans and it’s the most beautiful sound Iwaizumi has ever heard making his hips buck forward as he continues marking his way down Oikawa’s neck. Oikawa has trouble breathing right, licking his own mouth and biting down his lip as Iwaizumi’s movements send a sharp shiver down his spine, straight to his crotch.

They both become more frantic and almost violent with one another. They don’t even care anymore, they just want more, need more. Oikawa’s smiles as Iwaizumi keeps tracing kisses down his neck, now down and over his collarbone tasting Oikawa’s skin. Making him shake and tremble under him at every lingering brush of Iwaizumi’s wet lips. Oikawa’s hand goes from Iwaizumi’s ass to his bare stomach, searching, and then he slides it down over the front of Iwaizumi’s trousers.

Iwaizumi gasps and freezes before raising his mouth from Oikawa’s neck to look into the other boy’s eyes, his heart racing and every nerve in his body focused on the point of contact at the seat of his pants. He doesn’t know what he expects but he knows that he never wants Oikawa to ever stop touching him like this, and he thinks that shows on his face. Oikawa’s expression is steady and, after a moment of hesitation, his hand slips over the waistband and into Iwaizumi’s pants, fingers brushing against him. Iwaizumi bites down his lip, suppressing a moan, and his eyes flutter shut at the touch.

Oikawa frowns like he’s concentrating, and smiles hesitantly. He gives him another long stroke, which makes Iwaizumi’s mind go over the moon and his cock twitch hard behind the clothes. He looks at him, his eyes dark but seriously asking him for permission. Iwaizumi understands, and he nods. He nods and there is barely any hesitation, because he’s been waiting for so long without even knowing it. And this could all end, so soon. What if Oikawa is right and they are going separate ways? He’s happy they have done this before it’s too late, because they would have regretted it all their lives.

Iwaizumi wants to be there for him, with him. For this and so much more. He wants to be there to smack Oikawa’s head when he’s angry, when he’s annoying and when he’s jealous. He wants to be there to wipe away his tears and giving him smiles when words aren’t enough. He wants to be there to hold his hands, and kiss him when he most needs it. When they both do. He wants to see him grow and succeed, finally. He wants to grow with him. Iwaizumi feels like a life without Oikawa would be an empty life, and right now he’s happy his body is accepting that as well.

Iwaizumi nods, and Oikawa is so quick to work on his belt and his trousers that he pushes them down in a clunky jerk. Iwaizumi does the same, supporting himself on one of his elbows, half kneeling over Oikawa. Their underwear is still there to separate them, but when they grind against each other it brings them both relief and more frustration. Oikawa brings Iwaizumi’s head down and gives his neck a long lick, until he takes his earlobe in his mouth and bites down. Iwaizumi loses it and gives out a loud groan that fills the quiet of the room.

Oikawa stares at him with such eager enthusiasm that Iwaizumi wonders if he’s the same kid he’s always known. Oh, but he is.

They don’t talk, they barely manage to breathe and then Iwaizumi startles Oikawa with such a passionate kiss they both fall apart. And their hands are not shy anymore, they wander over each other’s bodies until Oikawa moans loudly and can’t take it anymore. He brings both their pants down, something that Iwaizumi barely notices, too busy kissing him, and then they both have to take a moment because their bare skin touches and the feeling is so strong they are about to burst into flame. If they already haven’t.

Oikawa’s hand runs down Iwaizumi’s cock once, and Iwaizumi has to break off the kiss, leaning over Oikawa’s forehead trying to keep it together. He frowns at the touch, as he feels so hard it almost hurts. He breathes into Oikawa’s parted mouth, and bites his own tongue. Oikawa kisses him once but it’s a mess and when Iwaizumi lowers his hips and they touch, it’s pure hell and pleasure. Their bodies stick together with sweat and want.

Oikawa’s head bump against the floor and Iwaizumi’s hand goes down to help him. He takes Oikawa in his hand and runs a thumb over his tip, spreading precome over it, before stroking down his cock once. Long and slow and making his own dick touch with his, which flares them both up. Oikawa’s hand keeps working, and they find themselves rubbing their hips closer and closer as they try to pleasure each other as much as they can. And it ends up being quick and still, desperate. It ends up with them not knowing what they are doing, staring into each other’s eyes and gasping for fresh air that doesn’t get to their lungs. Iwaizumi is loving it, and he can’t even think right now He can only feel Oikawa’s body under his, their hands working  together and desire eating them alive.

It’s a mess, but Oikawa holds on tight to Iwaizumi’s head and doesn’t let go. The fire in the pit of his stomach starts bubbling out of control, and every touch against Iwaizumi’s hand, against him, makes him moan. It kills him. The tension builds up in his body and it’s hot, so hot but at the same time he freezes every time Iwaizumi’s mouth leaves his to catch his breath.

It’s a mess, but Iwaizumi doesn’t want this to end. It feels so good, so warm and new. He rubs them together a few more times, every stroke along with wet kisses and choked groans.

“Hajime-” Oikawa says, and his harsh, intense voice is what brings Iwaizumi to the edge, the last thing he truly needed.

Iwaizumi, with Oikawa’s help, rubs down his cock one more time and then it’s too much. With a muffled cry he comes over Oikawa’s stomach, squeezing his eyes shut and pulling at Oikawa’s hair. It doesn’t take much for Oikawa to follow, the view of Iwaizumi coming undone above him enough to bring him pleasure for another hundred of years. He comes, and it is a true mess. He mumbles words none of them can understand and then Oikawa kisses him one last time, deep and warm.

Their lips break off, and Iwaizumi crashes on the ground next to him, rolling away from Oikawa just a little. They pant for several seconds, and Iwaizumi is not sure whether the room has been quiet around them all this time or he just wasn’t paying enough attention. Of course he wasn’t. Oikawa’s hand reaches for his and Iwaizumi startles, before his body relaxes again. He lets Oikawa hold his hand, squeezing back.

Oikawa’s other hand reaches for one of the shirts on the ground near them, probably his own, and cleans himself quickly. He hands the shirt to Iwaizumi, who turns his head to face him and rolls his eyes, because that’s disgusting but it’s okay. He’s also aware he’ll have to lend him a new shirt now, that will be fun to explain to his mother. Oikawa smiles and Iwaizumi sighs deeply, returning the light smirk. Looking at each other is hard, but it’s easy. And Oikawa’s eyes look like all the anger in them is gone which is an overwhelming relief. There is now only Iwaizumi’s reflection in those iridescent eyes.

“Why didn’t this happen when we lost against Ushiwaka?” Oikawa says and Iwaizumi brings a hand up to the other boy’s face to push him away. It hurts, because Oikawa’s face is still aching from the punch before but he barely notices. He really doesn’t care, and Iwaizumi hasn’t been that hard on him anyway, he wishes.

“Ouch!” Oikawa complains but, in less than a minute, they are both laughing like idiots on the floor like they don’t have a care in the world. The sky outside is clearing up, and the sun kisses them both with gentle light which brings them back to life. Laughing feels good, there are tears in their eyes again but at least it’s for a whole other reason. Or at least that’s what it feels like.

Right in the middle of it a phone rings. The “X-files” theme echoes in the room, that’s Oikawa’s phone. At the sound of it Iwaizumi only laughs more along with his best friend (are they just best friends, though?), until Oikawa gives up. He stands up, trying not to stumble over since his legs are still quite numb from… whatever they just did, and answers his phone.

Iwaizumi stands up too, sitting on the bed and listening to Oikawa’s conversation.

“Yes, it’s me.” Oikawa says, suddenly serious.

“Really? Yes! Yes of course I’m free!” A huge grin appears on his face and Iwaizumi frowns, who could it be? He almost feels jealous, because he wants to be the only one to make Oikawa smile like that and it’s absurd because he’s always known that but it’s the first time he ever admitted to himself. But the feeling doesn’t last for long.

“Wait.” Oikawa says urgently. “You know… we had a really great ace.” Iwaizumi frowns more, what is going on? He tilts his head when Oikawa turns around and nods, with the phone still stick to his ear, and smiles right at him. A smile that says he’s up to something, a smile Iwaizumi knows well.

“Yep. I’m glad you saw that too. Yes.” Oikawa keeps nodding and Iwaizumi narrows his eyes, he wants to smile back too because Oikawa looks radiant and just so excited, but he still can’t be sure.

“He’ll be free. The most available guy you will ever know. Of course I’m sure, when do I ever lie?” There is a small pause and Oikawa’s eyes widen and then he pouts. “Yes, yes I know you can’t know that, but trust me you won’t regret it. I’m sorry… I’m still not lying, though.” A smile comes back.

“We’ll be there! Thank you so much!” The call ends and Oikawa puts the phone down over the desk, staring at Iwaizumi from there. Iwaizumi raises his eyebrows in question.

“Well? Who was that?”

“That, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa steps forward and his smile grows wider. “was a guy from Tokyo University’s talent scouts who, apparently, saw our last match with Karasuno.”

“And?” Iwaizumi so doesn't want to get his hopes up, but something in Oikawa’s eyes tells him it’s okay if he does.

“And we have an interview scheduled for the day after tomorrow at four pm.” Oikawa hesitates.

“And you are coming, I don’t care if you are busy or whatever.” He adds, but Iwaizumi doesn’t care. He starts smiling too and he just can’t stop, like he couldn’t stop crying just a few minutes ago now he feels like the happiest guy in the world.

“Does that mean…?” That means they have a chance to be in the same team again, to play together again. It means they’ll keep going to school together, study together, support each other and both win and lose together. Again. Iwaizumi’s chest feels warm and full of new hope, it feels amazing. It feels better than winning against Shiratorizawa too, probably. Being at the same university, in the same team… it means they can be together. Like teammates, best friends and more. They don’t have to say goodbye, it doesn’t have to be sad and dramatic they still have a chance. And Iwaizumi is not willing to let it go.

Oikawa takes another step forward and smirk down at him, challenge and determination in his shining eyes.

“You ready to fight for our future together Iwa-chan?” He asks, and Iwaizumi grins back.

“Baka Tooru, of course I’m ready.” He says and Oikawa doesn’t hesitate. He laughs and runs towards Iwaizumi, jumping over him and making them both end up lying over the bed. It’s surely not comfortable for Iwaizumi but he doesn’t care, he hugs Oikawa tight and laughs with him. As long as he can hold Oikawa in his arms, and as long as he can be there for him, with him, he’s fine. It’s all fine.

Oikawa hugs him back. Before, his world was made of darkness,  but now he knows Iwaizumi is his own light. Iwaizumi will guide him home, where they are both going to be, and they will be together.  

It’s everything they could ever ask for.

 

(even though beating both Karasuno and Shiratorizawa would sure have been fun, but they have time now)


End file.
